This is me at age 2½. It's in my bedroom in Stockton, CA. I remember that was my favorite outfit at the time. I still have one of the teddy bears on the bed behind me. The thing hanging on the wall was a picture of two birds with the following caption:

Said a Robin to a Sparrow:

"I would really like to know
why these anxious human beings
rush about and worry so."

Said the Sparrow to the Robin:

"Friend, I think that it must
be, that they have no Heavenly
Father, such as cares for you
and me."

I have no idea how old I am here. The person behind me is my grandmother. My grandfather had a long standing tradition of chopping people's heads off in pictures. Ever memorial day we'd go to the cemetary and put flowers on all of our family that was buried there, and hence the setting for this picture.

This is me and my dad. I'm guessing I must be about 4 or 5 in that picture. As best I can tell this is in front of the house in Stockton, on scenic and lovely Filbert Street. I think that building in the back was a repair shop that later closed down and was abandoned for years.

This is the infamous Nicole. I went with her to Homecoming my senior year, which puts this picture in the autumn of 1992, and me at age 17. The only "major" dance I went to in high school. I seem to recall her not wanting a picture taken with my arm around her. She really knew how to make a guy feel special.

This is my ex-girlfriend, Cas, and I at either Sadie Hawkins or Tolo. Some girl-ask-guy affair. Part of the shtick was that you were supposed to wear the same clothes. The theme was "Sleepless in Seattle", hence the background in our picture. (No, that isn't the real Seattle skyline.) This would have to be winter of 1993, making me 18 in the picture.

This is me around late October of 1999, making me 24. I'd gotten this picture taken so that I could have a lasting memory of myself with long hair. Beside me is Stacia, friend, co-worker, and arch-nemesis.

This is Glynis and I at the Seattle Cherry Blossom and Japanese Cultural Festival. They had this one exhibit where you could try on kimonos and get your picture taken. Poloroids at 2 bucks a pop. This is in April 2000, right before my life began the steady spiral into decline. Which would make me 24.

© 2000 Jeremy Zimmerman, unless where noted. All rights reserved. Comments, complaints, death threats, and flaming chickens may be sent to bolthy@bolthy.com.